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奇葩极品前任(双语)

线话英语|2014-06-06 10:49:00
 

 

We've all got a crazy ex, and sharing stories about how insane they were is one of life's great joys.

每个人都遇到过极品前任,将那些他们如何极品的故事与他人分享,这也是人生的一大乐趣。

We've compiled the worst of the worst below. They're so bad, you might even begin to think your ex was relatively sane in comparison.

我们收集了一些关于极品中的极品的故事。他们如此恶劣,你甚至会觉得,相较之下你的前任还算正常。

1. "He left me stranded 1,000 miles away from home in Texas while he went to Arizona and called me to tell me he's leaving me for his step-sister."

“他去亚利桑那州的时候,把我留在德克萨斯州,在离家1000英里的地方。然后他打电话告诉我,他想和他继母的女儿在一起,所以要和我分手。”

2. "I left for a week to LA and when I came home he dumped me via text message. Totally unexplained and he had just called me that morning telling me he loved me and was so happy to see me again soon. Two days later he released a song about how he dumped me."

“我去洛杉矶待了一周。回家之后他用短信把我给甩了。没有任何理由,而且他在那头早上还打电话给我说他爱我,说又可以见到我了很开心。两天之后他发布了一首新歌,歌的内容是他如何如何甩了我。”

3. "While we were still dating, my ex decided to take a drunken joyride in my truck without me knowing. She crashed it into a tree, totaled the truck but she was completely fine. The worst part? She was going to the guy she'd been cheating on me with."

“我们还在一起的时候,有一天我的前任女友喝醉了,然后在我不知道的情况下,她决定开着我的卡车出去兜风。她撞到了一棵树,卡车完全报废了,她却一点儿没事。最可怕的是,她一直背着我在劈腿,开车就是去见另一个男友。”

4. "She posted a listing about me on Craigslist in the male seeking male section. She gave my phone number."

“她在Craigslist广告网站上寻找男同的一栏里发布了关于我的信息。她还把我的电话号码给曝光了。”

5. He dumped the contents of an outdoor trashcan (including the nasty water in the bottom) into my trunk. It took months to get the smell out.

他把大街上垃圾桶里的东西(包括垃圾桶底部臭臭的汁液)倒到了我的卡车里。那股臭味几个月才散干净。

6. "She would steal $20 bills from my wallet at night. I finally had to set up a sting operation to catch her. As soon as I did the one year relationship was over."

“她有天晚上从我的钱包里偷走了20块钱。最后我不得不设下圈套才逮住她。逮住了她,我们之间维系了一年的关系也就结束了。”

7. She changed the password on her Netflix so I couldn't use it for free anymore. Like, what kind of person does that?

我的前任把她的Netflix(美国付费流媒体视频网站)密码改了,我再也没法免费用了。你看这都什么人啊!


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