女人爱耍宫心计 勾心斗角是天性

It's a brave statement to make - and is likely to be countered by the many billions of women who dote on their best female friends. But writer Kelly Valen has sparked controversy in the U.S. by claiming that women are 'inordinately' mean to each other. Her new book, The Twisted Sisterhood, she discusses what she calls 'the dark side of female friendship', and argues why she believes women hate each other far too much.
　　

虽然承认这个事实需要莫大的勇气，但是女人之间的“小心眼”“勾心斗角”竟是天性使然？美国两性著名作家 Kelly Valen毫不客气地指出，虽然几亿女性都宣称她们有多爱自己的“闺蜜”，然而事实上女人和自己闺蜜之间“不同程度”上都时不时耍个小心眼、甚至舍得“刻薄”对待自己的女性朋友，换句话来说，那就是“说翻脸就翻脸”！作家 Kelly Valen在自己即将出版的新书中阐述了“她眼中女性友谊之间的黑暗面”，力证“女性之间的恨大于爱”这个观点。

　'Females draw people in, we're intimate, we share so much,' she explained in an interview with The Times today. 'But it is this expectation of warmth and nurturing that creates a greater disappointment. It tees you up for this really great fall.' The mother-of-four, who is a lawyer and part-time writer, says she is not on a mission to criticise her sex. Her book is based on personal experience, and the idea was sparked by a chance meeting with a former sorority 'sister'.

作家 Kelly Valen说，女性一般表面和睦，分享心事，但是内心攀比现象十分严重，暗地里“互掐”是再正常不过的事情。据作家分析，女性之间的互掐并不是她们从一开始打心底就“憎恶”自己的闺蜜，与此相反，更是因为她们对朝夕相处的闺蜜们“期望过高”而最后目的不能达到后巨大的失落感造成的。身为4个孩子的母亲，作家Kelly Valen承认这本“攻击女性”的书籍一经出版已经遭到同性们的“板砖”情况，但是她坚称书籍所宣传的主张完全是根据她自身真实经历“有感而发”编写而成的。

Valen was reminded of a traumatic time at university when she lost her virginity to a fellow student who raped her when she had passed out after getting drunk. But she says the sequence of events that followed was worse still. Her fellow sorority members isolated her, implying that she was to blame for the rape, before eventually excluding her from the club altogether. 'Their betrayal cut so deep that it has left me anxious and cowering to this day,' she wrote.

据悉，Valen大学时候一段悲惨经历促使她萌发写书的愿望。Valen在大学去酒吧喝酒后遭到强暴，丧失了处女身份的她不但没受到闺蜜们的同情，反而遭到她们的一致排挤。身败名裂的Valen不但自己要承受被强暴的痛苦，还要被闺蜜们认定自己才是被强暴的主要原因，大学时光的经历让Valen彻底会所谓的女性闺蜜们死心，也对她往后的价值观潜移默化产生巨大影响。

'One minute I was hosting all-girl slumber parties, the next thing I knew a tsunami of mean-girling descended and I found myself feeling awkward and wary around women for more than a decade. 'Expectations ran high, the let-down cut deep, and the fall from that innocent sisterly grace proved very, very steep.' It inspired her to write an article about it for the New York Times, which led to such a huge response from readers that Valen decided to turn her piece into a book.

少年时代的阴影让Valen 痛苦不堪，她说：“我前一秒中还是她们的同甘苦的好姐妹，下一秒就变成了臭味的苍蝇！”这段经历让Valen伤得非常深，促使她关于“女性之间恨比较多”的文章在《纽约时报》上发表，没想到，这篇文章受到广大好评，这下Valen才决定写书的！